I’m not sure what I meant to write today. There have been several ideas, none of which made it to this page before becoming sidetracked. We have been exploring, balancing our checkbook, and spending almost half the week in Portland. Sunrises. Pedicures (not mine). Travel (not me either).

Weather has flipped over to Autumn and the vine maples are bright red this year. Sometimes they turn purple. Some years the trees slide from green to dead without celebration. Big leaf maples often do this—called “big leaf” because their leaves are larger than my two hands placed side by side. I have a jewelry box made of “tiger maple” that is actually from a big leaf tree. The fancy grain results from stress put on branches that rub against one another. It is a tree of the Pacific NW. That is: local.

But trees and wood are not what I meant to write about.

I have not heard from some friends in a while. Probably our oldest friend is moving to a group home. Another has suffered enormous losses I dare not list here. One drove to Canada. One is in France, which seems to be a safer place to be these days than the United States. She’s staying outside a small village in the south, but even there she can pick up an instant covid test at the little local market.

I have no idea where I might find one. (Wish I were there.)

Our in-laws have covid. The twins were symptomatic first, then the older boy who is in school tested positive, then both parents who are doctor and nurse. The nurse was mostly working from home. Now they are all home. No one seems to have a serious case, thank goodness. Of course the parents are fully vaccinated. We are hoping for a booster next month.

When we are in Portland, as we are now, we are required to be masked indoors in public places, but we also choose to be masked whenever we go out. Many people do not and that makes it harder for the rest of us.

Exploration is something I meant to write about. Since 9 August when we officially began moving in, we have walked a great many places and discovered some wonderful things: the Rose Garden, New Seasons, and the local public library. I have not had access to a free public library in over forty years, so my new library card is almost a revelation to me. It is marvelous to read books without having to buy them first. Another wonderful thing is having four grocery stores within easy walking distance: Zupan’s (8 blocks), Fred Meyer’s (4), Trader Joe (2), and New Seasons (13) which we did not even know was here until the first time we walked to the library (16 blocks) and wandered a bit on our way home. A great bakery on the corner. We have walked past liquor stores, drug stores, restaurants representing traditional food from all over the world, taverns (including five McMenamins!), mid- and high-end clothing, mid- and high-end furniture, yoga and massage, and pedicures. So many places offering pedicures!

So in addition to not traveling on vacations, add another cost I have saved over my adult life: pedicures. No professional haircuts, manicures, pedicures, and no hired house-painters. I painted all our walls (and heaven-help-me, the ceilings too), finished all the floors in our house (and nailed them down before that), created beadboard wainscot and a T&G ceiling from salvaged clear fir, made shelves, and installed both marble and ceramic tile. I have, in my day pulled wire and nailed sheetrock—though once was enough to convince me never again. And while I am at it, I am about done with painting and lifting heavy objects. We hope we are done moving furniture. We took our sons’ offer to move a sofa for us recently and they chipped the stair paint, but less than we would have if we’d done it ourselves. We have no sofa in front of our television on the coast, and we will need “white glove delivery” once we can afford to order a replacement. A small upholstered chair and an oak library chair are not optimal for viewing a movie.

In the condo we have hung paintings and prints from the 1950s and before. A handsome printed recipe from the printmaker next door to Alice Waters original Berkeley restaurant went over the sink on our last visit. I bought it in the late 60s when I was there with Mom. To my left on the wall beside the bed is an etching she gave me finally in a folk art frame I’ve had for forty years or more. “Soul Queen” came to Portland too. It feels like everything in Portland is done, if only Gary will bring more things. So, settled?

And then my checking did not balance and I have been exact to the penny since last year. And even though the bank thought I had more money than I did, I couldn’t help but worry that the situation—if I fail to figure it out—might reverse itself next month? But then…Gary found part of the problem (the condo payment listed twice), and I found the other bits. It’s okay now.

Do these errors mean my brain is coming apart or have I merely been distracted in recent weeks? I am going with distracted. And sitting uncomfortably in the evening. And worrying too much about money. And not knitting or sewing or writing fiction.

Creating improves my mood. My birthday is the day after tomorrow and Gary has encouraged me to order yarn which you know I do not need. Nevertheless, I have ordered two skeins of yarn and an actual sweater pattern for my granddaughter’s Christmas. I will post photos.

All better now?