Camp NaNo day 18: Around and Around

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Gary managed to put his new wheel barrow together without any help from me.

There should be a photo here showing the huge amount of trash we licked up yesterday—not to mention this morning. However, I put my camera down someplace and Gary had to find it for me. Check below for the flotsam photo. It’s impressive.

Camp NaNoWriMo word count: 25,405 as of 10:20am on Thursday, 18 April 2019

EMD word count at 75,543—revision to page 165. I might finish Part 2 today, and then I will do something else (see below). The word count for the novel dips and then rises as I revise and  shrinks and rises while fiddle as I read it through again. Chapter 8 seemed a little too long at about 5300 words, and then it was a few hundred words longer, and now it’s back up to 5327. 

I am late this morning for no particular reason except that I did not begin writing so early—just a few minutes ago, in fact. Our contractor is here and later this morning or afternoon I will paint the ceiling and at least one was and put a coat of Kilz on the fridge and maybe call it good. 

I’m just going to say that I would not hire me to paint a door, as I am an imperfect amateur. I am painting because a professional job would have cost more than a couple hundred dollars. This is one of those cases where no, my time is not worth more than that. It takes no more than an hour for each coat, three coats outside and frame, then two

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The floats are a gift, but the bulging plastic bag is stuffed with trash.

so far on the inside plus frame. The inside face, which I painted yesterday, was harder than the outside. I felt pretty confident about getting a smooth coat on the outside, where the primed finish had just enough tooth to grab paint. The inside was absolutely smooth and the paint wanted to slide into grooves and off ridges. And there are drips on the top inside of the door. Drips. The door will survive its imperfections and so will I. 

I have pocketed Ada Limón’s “Instructions on Not Giving Up.” The poem are my novel’s epigraph. 

I am loving Dreyer’s English, though his explanation for why two spaces after a period existed and why there is only one space after a period now is pretty much as ridiculous as every other explanation I have read. Variable width fonts are not an invention of the computer age; they existed long before typewriters. The double space is a casualty of an easy computer editing strategy, where, as he points out, a find/change can remove all random/accidental double spaces in a moment. (Unless you want to keep the ones setting off sentences, in which case they had to be looked and and kept or lost one at a time.) There is a significant exception. APA form requires two spaces, last time I checked. 

And while I am about it: I am a serial/Oxford comma person. All the way. The only time I prepared to fight with an editor (bless them, seriously) was in a journal that wanted to kill my Oxford comma. Not a chance. 

We are a third through The Far Side of the World, book 10, and I am several inches into the second half of the baby blanket. The blanket is looking pretty after all.

Camp NaNo day 17: Up and Down

Camp NaNoWriMo word count: 24,840 as of 6am on Wednesday, 17 April 2019

EMD word count at 75,317—revision past page 129. As I revise the word count goes down then up then down again. Chapter 13 needs to lose at least a thousand words, but I won’t be there anytime soon.   

We were busy, but I did not make much progress writing in the last 24 hours, but I did read quite a bit, walked the beach, played Scrabble with a friend, made a bread pudding, finished the first half of a knitted baby blanket. The west face of our house is completely re-shingled and smells of cedar. Tomorrow I will put a couple of coats of paint on the new door, Thursday it will be installed, and Friday morning I will paint the ceiling. At least the ceiling.

Camp NaNo day 16: CHEATING

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Camp NaNoWriMo word count: 24,698 as of 6:30am on Tuesday, 16 April 2019

EMD word count at 75,321—revised again through page 129.

I have already discovered a place where I’d pasted in a scene a second time—I was so sure I’d done that. I wrote new lines. I revealed no more than I must about the tragedy. It should, theoretically go in the center chapter 8, but something else happens then. A life transition works. 

The news reported the fire at the cathedral of Notre-Dame. I approached the story three times, each time shying away. I feel an investment in her engineered and necessary flying buttresses and elegant, irrational details. It’s okay with the reporter that the gorgeous spire has burned since it is “not original” but added later, but most everything was added later as they found benefactors to pay for her rose window and side windows, the detailing of wood and glass that the builders planned for but could only complete after the money came in. [Thank you, Darlene Sherrick.] 

The cable was out and the good news was that it was not our cable but everyone’s. 

Our education system works overtime to reinforce gender separation. According to The Atlantic:

“Friendship is a critical influence on what boys are learning about cultural norms and permission to be yourself. Because of the way children are separated by gender beginning in elementary school, boys’ first friendships are often with other boys. They learn to practice skills of sharing and intimacy and connection with other boys well before they do it with girls. And we know from research that boys’ friendships can be rich and deep and life-sustaining. Boys will say, ‘Without my friends I think I’d die.’ ” 

When my younger son started school, his best friend was a girl just up the road. That relationship was forced underground before they were seven. By high school they hadn’t spoken in years. By the time the girl was in high school, that girl had been deeply involved with two popular and famously brutal boys. Her parents didn’t want to hear my concerns and neither did she. She never forgave me for trying. 

And from Elizabeth Kolbert’s recent article about America’s troubling history with ridiculous conspiracy theories: 

“Donald Trump got his start in national politics as a ‘birther,’ promoting the idea that President Barack Obama wasn’t born in the United States. Several news organizations have tried to keep track of the conspiracy theories Trump has floated since then. One list, posted by the Web site Business Insider, has nineteen entries. These include the claims that vaccines can cause autism and that Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia may have been murdered.

“ ‘They’re saying they found the pillow on his face,’ Trump said of Scalia, during the 2016 campaign, ‘which is a pretty unusual place to find a pillow.’ (The Business Insider list is limited to full-blown conspiracy theories, and excludes the President’s more casual lies and fabrications.) ‘No president—indeed, no national official—has resorted to accusations of conspiracy so instinctively, so frequently, and with such brio as Donald Trump,’ Muirhead and Rosenblum write.” 

It’s still my country. Right or wrong? Right. I would wish it were right more often. 

Camp NaNo day 15: PARTY

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Our granddaughters eating birthday cake. There were a lot of adults at this party, but no one had more fun that the six cousins

Camp NaNoWriMo word count: 23,804 as of 6:20am on Monday, 15 April 2019

EMD word count at 74,883—revision begins later today! 

Bibi Andersson died. I had to go look up all my favorites of her films. The Seventh Seal. Babette’s Feast.

I am reading Ada Limón’s poems. My goal yesterday was to submit something, and I managed two story submissions. I made a single document of three poems. I looked up submission requirements for a favorite journal, and they will go out in the mail today. Then, we went to a birthday party, came home, and I made dinner, and began work on outlining what I need to do to the novel. Oh! And I worked a bit on the new Louise DeFleur story! 

In the mean time, I am reading other news. 

“Buying College Essays Is Now Easier Than Ever. But Buyer Beware” by Tovia Smith reveals the flood of ghost-written essays showing up on college campuses:

“As the recent college admissions scandal is shedding light on how parents are cheating and bribing their children’s way into college, schools are also focusing on how some students may be cheating their way through college. Concern is growing about a burgeoning online market that makes it easier than ever for students to buy essays written by others to turn in as their own work. And schools are trying new tools to catch it.”—Mind/Shift <https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/53446/buying-college-essays-is-now-easier-than-ever-but-buyer-beware?>

The author is right that this has long been a problem, as has the rationale for cheating. “ ‘Technically, I don’t think it’s cheating,’ the student says. ‘Because you’re paying someone to write an essay, which they don’t plagiarize, and they write everything on their own.’ ”

Excuse me? 

Catching cheaters is an enormous challenge. I have caught students cheating because the writing was too polished for that student, because they submitted an essay in the wrong font or format (APA instead of MLA), because the student left traces of their source, or because the subject matter of a story was entirely unlikely (first person from an elderly woman in east London? please). Once I caught them, I had to prove that they were guilty. 

I routinely verified sources in research papers, demanded that hard copies of their sources be turned in with the paper, and since I also required student to write on demand at least once a week in class, I had a general sense of how they thought and how they constructed sentences and argument.

There have been examples of cheating I am certain I missed. (I was unable to prove one case of suspected cheating because the source was well disguised. I could not prove it, however certain I was.) I am not at all confident that I could prove what I suspected was a ghost-written essay, though new software can catch inconsistencies of style and sources. 

Smith is right about the solution. Ethical behavior is an essential value. Another is recognizing that education is not gained through grades and credits but through learning and experience. Bluffing and cheating through school means that someone else learned and someone else had the experience. It is the waste of educational opportunity. 

And there was the party!

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Meanwhile, our grandson on the carpet was not all that excited about pausing for cake.

Camp NaNo day 14: WE CAUGHT A BREAK

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This is some of what we gathered this morning (plus a handful of agates). Most of the little pieces of broken plastic and squashed polystyrene foam are under or in the plastic bottles. Five more Bic lighters (lower left) make a total of nine this month. Much of the trash has been at sea for a while—slivers of aluminum left from corroded soda cans, plastic with saline growing on it. There are wood chips like you would make with an ax, lots of driftwood, and several entire trees newly washed up on the sand. One tree is thick with gooseneck barnacles the gulls have been eating.

Camp NaNoWriMo word count: 19,002 as of 6:30am on Sunday, 14 April 2019

EMD word count has one more “resting” days at 74,883

We walked most of the way north, but gathered so much trash we did not make it to the headland before turning for home. The tide was past full when we started, and sneakers drove us into the rocks again and again, so that was another impediment. The rain began before we got home again. 

I am knitting a baby blanket and reached the point where I must wait for replacement yarn to arrive. There is writing I should be working on, but which I do not want to work on. But I did that anyway. 

I made pad Thai for dinner, wrapped a present, and read. 

“Theater is like sausage: If you love it you should never watch it being made.”—Empty Space

The director’s name is Ian. 

The Widow’s Lament in Springtime

William Carlos Williams, 18831963

Sorrow is my own yard
where the new grass
flames as it has flamed
often before but not
with the cold fire
that closes round me this year.
Thirtyfive years
I lived with my husband.
The plumtree is white today
with masses of flowers.
Masses of flowers
load the cherry branches
and color some bushes
yellow and some red
but the grief in my heart
is stronger than they
for though they were my joy
formerly, today I notice them
and turn away forgetting.
Today my son told me
that in the meadows,
at the edge of the heavy woods
in the distance, he saw
trees of white flowers.
I feel that I would like
to go there
and fall into those flowers
and sink into the marsh near them.



[in the public domain]

Camp NaNo day 13: WE NEED A BREAK 

Camp NaNoWriMo word count: 18,116 as of 5:40am on Saturday, 13 April 2019

EMD word count has two more “resting” days at 74,883

I found my grandmother’s gravestone. There is, naturally, a website devoted to finding graves called, naturally, FindaGrave. My father adored his grandmother Rosetha was a markswoman, under 5 feet tall and strong-willed. She is buried at Forest Lawn in Glendale, California. (My mother never met her and seemed impatient hearing about her virtues—while I was enchanted.)  She was born Rosetha Alma Stiles, the first of at least four children both to Eliza Catherine Salsbury Stiles and Asa Butler Stiles. and her mother died in Minnesota when Rosetha was still a teenager. Her father would remarry and have three more children. One died in her third year. The other six surviving children, like my great grandmother, lived well into the 20th century. My dad liked to say she rode in covered wagons and in jet planes. But I must misremember that since commercial jet travel had not begun in her lifetime. On the other hand, my dad worked for Douglas Aircraft in Los Angeles before joining the Army during World War Two. 

Fridays I drive to Seaside to share work with another writer. Our meeting yesterday was reassuring. It was the best sort of feedback since it told me clearly what some part of me hoped and feared was true. The prose poem worked. Only the first stanza of the three-stanza poem worked. And the final paragraph on the essay was misplaced. I moved it and sent it off into the world. She also set me on the track of a novel with a situation very like the one I am struggling with in “Butterfly Fontanel” though George R. Stewart’s story is not otherwise like mine. My post-apocalyptic world resolves itself quite differently. My main character is Latina, the secondary character is lesbian and Black. A third, whom I have only told about and not brought onstage, is also Latina. I have dithered about names, but I think I will use family names. They are mine.

I hope I was as helpful in my comments to my writer-friend. 

I think my Rosa might measure the passage of seasons the way we do, by the position of the setting (or rising) sun in relation to some natural monument.

There are stories on the news about reparations for slave labor. Clearly it is not enough to send thoughts and prayers or even apologies. The racism crippling opportunities for people of color will not be resolved merely by good intentions. Still. I wonder when we will talk about reparations for repression of women? After all, women had almost no legal standing for most of our history. To a great degree, women were property as surely as slaves. If they were wealthy, they ate well, but in many places they could not be raped by their husband only because whatever a husband did to his wife was within his legal rights. For most of the history of this nation, women were denied the right to vote, to control property, sign contracts, serve on juries and participate fully in the economic, political, and social life of our nation. Our nation’s playing field is anything but level, but too many girls are still raised to smile on the sidelines rather than strive for their place at the table. We consistently and violently ignored the honorable intentions and specific directives of our own Constitution. White people placed bounties on the lives of Native peoples. U.S. policies failed utterly to respect promises in treaties. I would not presume to know what the answer is to resolve our deplorable racial, cultural, and sexual history.

And the president has promised a pardon to a man he insists should break the law. He seems to believe that he is allowed to do whatever he wants, regardless of the law, that he is immune and above the law. He advocates what members of his own party, what any law-abiding decent human being would recognize is a cruel policy regarding immigrants fleeing danger from the south, a policy which has been proven an absolute failure since historically falling levels of immigrants have now exploded in numbers. 

I hardly recognize my country these days. Though having two meticulous researchers for parents has always made me skeptical of historical accounts, I am an unlikely pragmatist and at heart an idealist. I want my country to be heroic and honorable. We are increasingly revealed as the bullies of the world.

Getting back to my great-grandmother Rosetha, the woman who does not resemble her theoretical English forebears: she was shorter than the rest of her family and slender in her bridal gown. Black hair and eyes and dark skin. I have always wondered if she were not a Native person, stolen or adopted from her people. I proposed this to my father many years ago, but he denied it vehemently. The story of six tall, red-headed coursins is not born out by the relatives listed on the FindaGrave site, but then again only my great aunt Vera is listed as her offspring. My father’s mother Elsie is not shown at all. Ancestry has not entranced me as it has others in our family. I have made no serious effort to locate relatives, constructed no family tree. I am more interested in where were are going than from whence we came, I suppose. 

Camp NaNo day 12: BUSY @ HOMEandAWAY

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Camp NaNoWriMo word count: 17,155 as of 8am on Friday

EMD word count has three more “resting” days at 74,883

I have considered that if I ever publish something and need “work clothing” to wear to a reading I already have perfectly serviceable items that are not getting much (or any) use these days. A friend then pointed out that I might need such clothing for a lunch in the city. Truthfully, I was never one of those ladies-who-lunch. What I have in my closet will cover me for a few years. What I need is new walking shoes. 

An apple crisp went into the oven and we gathered all the cedar scraps from the front yard—Gary did most of that while I started cutting up apples. 

And I need another story. But then I have a fragment to work on. Maybe that one. Maybe today after I finish the final draft of my book review. 

We had a late afternoon walk yesterday and found a great deal of trash, mostly from Japan because there is kanji all over it. The highlight was a Japanese condom wrapper. Also two pieces of glass and the sort of flat oval agate with spots I call Easter eggs. 

We tried watching a film about Gertrude Bell. The horses and scenery are magnificent but the story itself is all wrong, as if the woman’s romantic involvement (likely invented for the film) mattered more than all the rest of her existence.

Other than walking, meeting my writer-friend on Fridays, and a grocery run, I have not gone or done much other than read and write this month. I finished The Bird King by Shaun Tan—a stunning work. It was so good I had to order another copy because this one is meant as a gift. (Today is the second meeting with another writer for tea and sharing work and I have a great deal to share.)

However, our youngest grandchild is having a third birthday party on Sunday! We look forward to that.

Camp NaNo day 11: CURIOUS

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Curious about this tiny fish. It was dead, of course, because they usually are when e find them on the sand, but what is it? Also, seaglass, a green pebble only 3mm thick, and pumice.

Camp NaNoWriMo word count: 14,530 (it was 15,550 just a moment ago) as of 8:00am on Thursday, mostly journaling here. I passed 12k words yesterday afternoon and completed the second draft of a book review. Woke in the night and revised an essay, and then overslept.

Revised novel EMD word count is still holding at 74,883

Our walk gave us the tiny fish. We have never seen anything quite like it. You can see its eye about an inch back from the tip of its long,  skinny, toothed mouth. Gary says it looks like a gar, but that would mean fresh water and another part of the continent. Also, 13 whimbrels fishing for sand crabs, my fifth discarded cigarette lighter, so many tossed cigarette filter tips that I lost count, an empty two gallon water jug, ruined and abandoned toys, plastic bottle caps, plastic cups, plastic rope trimmings up to two feet long (and mostly green), and uncounted pieces of polystyrene foam, sometimes squashed and discolored from being tumbled in the rocks. One piece of plastic nearly passed as something else—a reminder that plastic does not burn away but melts into a lump, putting off toxins in the process. It was a good walk high in the rocks on our way north and down by the tideline on our way home. We barely got wet. 

I sanded down my grandfather’s breadboard and oiled it with mineral oil. Gary worked some more on the apartment. We went shopping for groceries and supplies for the apartment, and then we came home, ate lunch, and took a nap. Third coat on the door and frame, and we both scrubbed some more. I think it might be cleaner than our house. Actually, I am pretty sure that other than the living room floor, which will not be scrubbed until after the door is install, it is cleaner than our house. If I had the money I would replace the laminate counter with recycled-glass and an undercount sink. It is a precious space. 

Eileen Fisher has a beautiful tunic in a color I love and a price I can actually afford. But wait, now that I am retired, when will I ever need “work” clothes again? Ha! 

In the mean time, the Borowitz report is having a tough time coming up with more outlandish satirical news when the real news is so outlandish. I am trying not to read too much with T in it, but even so . . .  

I started a Louise DeFleur story in my regular paper journal, but I need to sit with a timer and force it out of my head and onto the page. Today, we are still cleaning. I will order a blind for the bedroom. The rain has let up as I write (it’s 4:34 in the morning). There is wood all over the beach, or there was the last time I checked in daylight: branches, logs, and a pallet right out in front. If we had not been so busy working on the apartment, we’d have gone out for a second walk for a closer look. 

I am ashamed to admit I left the lid off the paint can last night. Gary did not win the lottery.

Camp NaNo day 10: CHORES

Camp NaNoWriMo word count: 14,016 as of 6:30am on Wednesday, mostly journaling here and working on the essay, which I submitted yesterday (incorrectly, as it turns out).

Revised novel EMD word count holding steady: 74,883

This is my fifth National Novel Writing Month event. I have written three 76k manuscripts in November 2016, 2017, and 2018. Last April I wrote the draft of a novella or novelette, a more modest goal. Rewriting and expanding that piece was part of my project in November. This April I set a modest goal of 10k. I have exceeded the word count thanks to journaling, and I am pretty much on tract to complete four pieces for submissions. I suppose this is the result of quitting Facebook last month.

It’s a sad day when The Guardian covers a U.S. political story better than The Washington Post. I couldn’t even find the story in The New York Times this morning. Brett Kavanaugh was disinvited to teach at Harvard because students protested his impact on campus:

There, four students wrote an op-ed in the Harvard Law Record, saying that an “opportunity to learn about the supreme court might not be equally available to women because many will self-select out of a class taught by a credibly accused sexual assailant”. Harvard announced in October that Kavanaugh said he could no longer commit to teaching at the school.—The Guardian

But this year George Mason signed a multi-year contract with Brett Kavanaugh and students there are upset too.

Law school faculty approved Kavanaugh’s appointment in January, according to the university, but his hire was first reported on 22 March by the George Mason student newspaper, the Fourth Estate.

Soon after Kavanaugh’s hiring became public, Mason For Survivors, a student group of sexual assault survivors and their advocates, created a petition and began hosting protests against Kavanaugh’s hiring.

“There is a historic amount of institutional negligence on your part to support survivors of sexual assault and the student body as a whole,” reads the petition, which is addressed to the administration of the university and has received more than 3,000 signatures.

The anger over the school’s hire is a stark reminder of the controversy that enveloped Kavanaugh last fall when he was appointed to the court.—The Guardian

In a particularly painful twist, “the course is slated to be held in the bucolic setting of Runnymede, where Magna Carta was sealed in 1215, and where George Mason University has located its Antonin Scalia Law School.” Sometimes I wonder.

In the mean time, our neighbors are hustling around in an attempt to disguise that they built three structures without bothering to apply for permits and without approval or inspections. That they also allowed trash and concrete to be dumped in a wetland . . . and that’s just the easy part to clean up, though it is the most distressing to the owners of the trashed property.

And it’s Camp NaNo!

I should be working on fiction. I know I have work to do on “Butterfly Fontanel” but cannot seem to get myself going. And I only have 6 days before I need to go back to work on the novel. I think I will be glad to look at it again. If I were willing to waste paper, I would print it off and read it from the beginning, but the truth is that every time I try doing that, the paper copy languishes. And I know it benefits from a hard copy review . . . or I think it does. At the very least, I need to begin reading Part 2 and see how that section flows. Section 3 has not had any sort of overview. And again, truth is that I have pasted in thousands of words and discarded more thousands without full oversight. It is my hurryhurryhurry. 

Also, I wanted a new Louise DeFleur story. That hasn’t even begun. The day after tomorrow I am meeting with a friend and I need to have something to share. 

Yesterday, Gary finished cleaning the kitchen and the bedroom and still has the bathroom to clean. He vacuumed and washed down all the walls this week (he hopes I will not have to do mire than touch up the paint) and scrubbed the windows in the living room so it all looks a lot better. I put two coats of paint on the new front door and its frame—the outside and edges of the door, the inside of the frame. It needs a week to fully cure and then I will flip it all over and get a first coat on the inside of the door and the outside of the frame before it;’s installed. I had ripped out the baby blanket I was knitting, sent off the yarn I did not like to exchange for another color, and started over with a new plan.

We are determined to have a slower day today and to get our walk. We don’t mind a little rain (we have rain gear), but we do generally avoid a full gale.

And it’s still NaNo.