Today, at least where I live, was a day to honor mothers. My mother and my husband’s mother have left the planet, as Gary says. Our fathers too, both of lung cancer, both Camels smokers, both veterans. His father died on Mother’s Day 1979.

I want to say something about mothering, because whoever birthed the people we care about, many of us mother. And father, too, is a verb with a broad implications. My mother used to say, “Think how the other person must feel.” She said this when someone was impatient or lost, more often when I was myself impatient or lost. She must have said that to me a hundred times.

Continue reading →